Karen Keller
Opportunities are like buses, there’s one coming by every 10 minutes. The problem is you can’t get on every bus and there is no magical formula for knowing which bus is the right one. So, you make the best guess, step out and grab on – only to realize that a different bus would have gotten you there quicker and better.
The same goes for opportunities. Not all opportunities pan out to be what’s best for you.
People are constantly faced with making decisions about which direction to go, when to share information, and how to move forward. With all of this going on, of course, you will sometimes miss an ample opportunity to further your growth, reputation or future.
When you miss an opportunity, what do you do?
Let’s look at what NOT to do.
Pouting. Pouting makes you look and behave more ridiculously. It tells people you are a baby who needs consoling. This is akin to playing the ‘victim’ in order to garner sympathy from anyone who will pay attention.
Complaining. This only brings negative energy and negative people, who will fan your complaining, into your life.
Blaming. Finding fault with others doesn’t absolve you from responsibility. In fact, it will only make enemies of friends.
Giving up. This is the absolute worst thing you can do! Nothing gained - nothing lost when you don’t try.
So, if these things don’t work, what does?
Here are 5 tips for surviving a missed opportunity:
1. Be certain about what you think was missed.
Find out if what you thought was an opportunity really was before you waste valuable time and emotion on it. Dig a little deeper into what you know or think of what you lost out on. Another tip is to know what an opportunity means to you.
2. Resurrect what you think could be a saved opportunity.
If it was an opportunity then explore all chances of finding it again. Maybe you aren’t too late. Perhaps the boss may reconsider her decision. Possibly the other ‘offer’ may have fallen through. In any case, exhaust all avenues of getting it back – it could be worth the effort.
3. Accept it wasn’t meant to be.
Believe that this isn’t the last opportunity that will come your way. The sooner you acknowledge that what was lost is beyond your reach is when you will notice other opportunities. Keeping alive the thoughts of what ‘could have been’ will only keep you stuck in the past, creating barriers, preventing you from experiencing what’s next.
4. Capture what you learned.
Make a list of the things you missed in seeing, hearing or feeling the opportunity when it was in front of you. What will you correct? How was your thinking about what you saw, heard or felt? Did you have tunnel vision? It pays to explore what happened and what went wrong. Even more so, it’s critical to put into action what you learned.
5. Say goodbye instead of hanging on.
Letting it go frees up your focus to find the next opportunity coming your way. Notice how you can change your problems or challenges into opportunities. Find out what’s missing – fill the gaps.
Developing coping strategies for missed opportunities helps you learn from what went wrong. This will maximize your chances of not missing out when the next opportunity presents itself.
